Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Frooty-Smacks - 3WW

I clicked on the news and was just about to dig into my bowl of Frooty-Smacks when my sister, Jessica, plopped herself down on the couch next to me. I eyed her for a moment. Normally, when she sees me eating cereal for dinner, she’d start lecturing me on the importance of eating a balanced meal. I glanced at her plate of grilled salmon, sautéed spinach and steamed rice.

I met her smug eyes.
“No sermon on my choice of cuisine?”
She laughed and reached for the remote that was on the couch between us.
“Not tonight, brother mine.” She clicked the button until she came to the channel she was looking for. “I’ve got more important things to worry about.”
Recognizing the opening music I blinked and tried not to gag around the milky cereal in my mouth.
“Not Mr. Eligible again? Are you serious?”

Her nose went up in the air.
“And what is wrong with Mr. Eligible?” She ate a bite of salmon. “The guy’s rich and really hot.”
“Oh, please.” I rolled my eyes. “He has to be rich and hot. That’s the only way he can get on the show. How can you watch this tripe?”
“It’s not tripe.” She turned up the volume, watching me out of the corner of her eyes. “It’s supposed to be a really good episode tonight. Everyone is taping it.”
“What for?” I asked. “So you and your friends can talk about it on Whotube?”
“Yep and on PlaceBook.” She leaned back, tossing the remote on the coffee table.

I glanced at the group of bikini-clad girls splashing about in the pool. I snorted but yeah, okay, the girls were kind of hot, I'll give it that. Then the camera pans to an overly-buffed arrogant-looking guy stretched out on an inflatable lounger in the pool. A couple of the girls were on smaller floaties, trying to outdo each other for his attention.

I looked back at my sister, shaking my head.
“You do know it’s scripted, right?”
“So?”
“So?” I repeated, sweeping my hand towards the screen. “They never stay together. They always break up a month later. It’s stupid.”

Jessica hit me in the arm.
“Okay, the girls can be pretty stupid but its still a good show. I like all the drama.”
I stuffed my mouth, snorting again. Knowing that she hates when I talk with my mouth full, I spoke anyway.
“How can you maintain a straight face saying that? Don’t you have any dignity?”
She hit my arm again.
“You should talk and stop being a pig."
I opened my mouth wide so she could see the chewed up food.
She rolled her eyes and shook her head.
"And besides, I have plenty of dignity.” My sister said this calmly but I can tell she was trying not to laugh. “It’s not my fault that some women chose to omit this trait in themselves for a chance to be on national television.”
She nodded towards the screen.

I looked over and almost swallowed my tongue, Frooty-Smacks and all.
The cameraman had zoomed in on the brunette that stood at the edge of the pool. My girlfriend slowly unhooked her bikini top, and with that flirtatious smile of hers, tossed the skimpy fabric aside. With her newly enhanced breasts blurred out, she made a graceful dive into the blue water…

© copyright 2011 by Ren Thompson June 22, 2011

10 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness! You took me completely by surprise! Well written, this flashy little tale.

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  2. OOOooooohhh!!!! I absolutely LOVED the ending! I did not see it coming at all!

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  3. Yep, what a punch of an ending (in a good, spill your cereal way)..very sweet and funny piece..Jae

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  4. A good write, and a startlingly good twisting finish.

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  5. Ouch. Great story, Ren. Must have made good reading on Whotube and PlaceBook the next day, for sure!

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  6. I will have cereal for dinner tonight I am sure :-P This was wickedly amusing I love how you changed the names of things and the end brilliant!

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  7. @Kim - thank you :)
    @Alice - Oh I know, eh? lol
    @Kwee - thank you, honey
    @Jae - Thank you Jae
    @Old Altonian - thank you, sir
    @Nico - yes, that was quite an ouch lol
    @mindlovemisery - Thank honey :)

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  8. haha.... it's a amazing what a new pair can do for a gal!!??

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  9. Sheilagh lee said;I like the twist of this story .Excellent story.

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